My grandmother is the type of older woman who might be confused for royalty, particularly if spotted in her natural habitat. (That is, wandering the pristine halls of Bergdorf Goodman, pondering how the colors of the newest Hermes scarves might pair with her sumptuous sable fur coat, leaving a trail of alluring perfume in her wake.)
She’s the type of woman who simply does not permit a chip in her nail polish, and couldn’t fathom being caught outside her home in anything less than a full, painted-on face of makeup and perfectly coiffed platinum blonde hair.
She wears cashmere, and…
“I don’t want to marry you,” he says, his blue eyes hard and sharp like broken pieces of glass.
A wave of intense nausea washes over me. I can feel the blood draining from my face; pins and needles are prickling in my neck.
His eyes dart to the ring on my left hand. I glance down, unable to speak.
The sparkle of the diamond that has delighted me for nine months is no longer beautiful. Instead, it’s mocking. It glitters prettily, symbolizing all the things that are slipping away in this moment.
The suburban house, filled with love and…
For those uninitiated into the realm of con-law nerdom, the Supreme Court recently issued a decision centering on a 40-foot Latin cross that looms over a highway in Bladensburg, Maryland.
I’m going to explain why you — presumably not a legal geek like me, and statistically speaking, probably not a resident of Bladensburg, Maryland — should give a damn about what they had to say.
Since its inception, The American Legion v. …
No, that isn’t the sound of me smacking my open palm against the face of the “hypothetical” man in this “made up” story about abuse that I’m about to tell you.
It’s the sound made by the papers from his “theoretical” lawsuit when they landed on the floor outside my “fictional” door.
Let me back up.
Picture this: You escape an abuser. You finally work up the cajones you were never really sure you had, and you leave his ass. You go to your local family court — A.K.A. …
In August 2017, my grandfather died.
Under other circumstances, his death would not have been traumatic. Though it’s always difficult to lose a loved one, there is nothing innately unnatural about a granddaughter losing a grandfather.
My Zayde, as I called him, lived a long, full life. Even though at the time, I wished it had been longer, 82 years is a good long time to spend on this planet.
But his death wasn’t ordinary.
The cause and setting were. Cancer — aggressive melanoma — was the impetus. …
If you’re reading this, you might already agree with what I’m about to say.
Statistically speaking, me, writing under this headline, and you, having clicked on it, probably have some opinions in common. So you may already be 90% sure that I’m about to give voice to your inner political dialogue (in a witty, delightfully comic tone, I hope).
Or maybe we don’t agree.
Maybe you’re reusing paper someone left in a shared office printer to line your bird’s cage, and I’ve managed to catch your eye while you’re filling Paul the Parakeet’s water bottle, but you and Paul are…
Recently, Israel’s Minister of Education, Rafi Peretz, compared interfaith marriage to the holocaust, suggesting that marriage across faiths is responsible for the loss of something like six million Jews since World War II.
Sadly, he isn’t the first Jew to make that argument. It’s a sentiment I heard more than once growing up in an Orthodox community. And Rafi’s sentiment has, at least by some, been applauded.
But I’m here to tell you (and Rafi) why that allegation is complete and total garbage.
Last shabbos, I baked a challah for my Norwegian boyfriend, Arne.
When I first met Arne, his…
On Thursday, The Forward published an opinion piece in which the author argued that Republicans are foolish to accuse Representative Ilhan Omar and three of her colleagues of anti-Semitism as a means to ingratiate themselves to Jewish voters. The same day, Omar sponsored House Resolution 496 (the BDS Bill) which seeks to affirm that “all Americans have the right to participate in boycotts in pursuit of civil and human rights at home and abroad.”
As a consequence, the conversation surrounding the author’s suggestion — that Republicans should stop invoking anti-Semitism to attack Representative Omar and her peers — was polarized…
New Yorker. Attorney. Kimchi enthusiast. (Mildly evil) human being with ideas about things.